Probably no more needs to be said about toothache than this poem by Robert Burns.

Wonder where the dental surgeries were in his day…. Barber’s shops? Maybe I’ll get round to looking up the history of dentistry some time.

In the meantime, here are links on what to do about toothache and its big sister the dental abscess.

TOOTHACHE

DENTAL ABSCESS

COUNTRY : UK

ADDRESS TO THE TOOTH-ACHE

“My curse upon your venom’d stang,
That shoots my tortur’d gums alang;
And thro’ my lugs gies mony a twang,
Wi’ gnawing vengeance;
Tearing my nerves wi’ bitter pang,
Like racking engines!

When fevers burn, or ague freezes,
Rheumatics gnaw, or cholic squeezes;
Our neighbors’ sympathy may ease us,
Wi’ pitying moan;
But thee – thou hell o’ a’ diseases -
They mock our groan!”

Adown my beard the slavers trickle!
I throw the wee stools o’er the mickle,
As round the fire the giglets keckle,
To see me loup;
While raving mad, I wish a heckle
Were in their doup.

O’ a’ the num’rous human dools,
Ill har’sts, daft bargains, cutty-stools,
Or worthy friends rak’d i’ the mools,
Sad sight to see !
The tricks o’ knaves, or fash o’ fools,
Thou bear’st the gree.

Where’er that place be priests ca’ hell,
Whence a’ the tones o’ mis’ry yell,
And rankd plagues their numbers tell,
In dreadfu’ raw,
Thou, Tooth-ache, surely bear’st the bell
Amang them a’!

O thou grim, mischief-making chiel,
That gars the notes of discord squeel,
Till daft mankiud aft dance a reel
In gore a shoe-thick; -
Gie a’ the foes o’ Scotland’s weal
A towmond’s Tooth-ache!”

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